I talk to myself

When you're a long-time Cubs fan, sometimes it helps to talk to yourself. Who cares if anyone else thinks you're crazy? You sort of have to be a little nuts to root for a team that hasn't won the World Series in 100 years.

One hundred years. I am not sure I can grasp how long that really is. You can put it into context and tell me that Teddy Roosevelt was president 100 years ago, or oil was hardly needed back then and probably cost something like 16 cents a barrel or that even no one lived in Alaska back then, and therefore couldn't see Russia from their backyard without Galileo's telescope.

The best way I can even begin to fathom the length of time this has been is that my beloved grandfather, a man I loved almost as much as my Cubbies and who died at the age of 92 in 1995 was 6 when the Cursed Wonders were last world champs. And that, I can dig, is a really, really long time ago.

I cannot stress how much I want my favorite sports team on the planet to get this frickin 4,000-ton gorilla (wow, that would be a damned big gorilla) off their back. But it's for more than just the simple reason of wanting what I have never had before and something that would in all likelihood finish in the top 3 moments of my life.

I want this historic run of futility to be over so people will just shut the hell up. That includes all the fans of other teams who already have won (sometimes multiple) World Series. Yes, shut up. I want fans of other teams who haven't won to shut up. I want people who aren't fans of any team to shut up.

JUST SHUT UP!

I can comprehend that telling people to shut up is about as mature as talking to one's self. This, though is what it has come to.

All this rambling leads me to tonight's NL Divisional Series Game 1 loss to the Dodgers.

I did a lot of mumbling to myself. (You can ask JLE, who was sitting across from me and although she's a Cubs fan, it had to be somewhat humorous for her.) All of this while trying to work and keep my sanity and trying not to jump out of my chair every time something went wrong.

Just so I don't keep it all bottled up, let me let y'all in on some of this conversation ...

Me: Yes, a two-run lead. I love that DeRosa. He has come through in plenty of clutch situations this season. I hope Dempster stops freakin walking people and we can get it to Marmol and Woody with the lead. You think we can do it?

Me: I feel good about it, but the walks are worrying me. They've got to yank him if he can't find control.

(Thirty minutes later. Grand slam. 4-2 Dodgers.)

Me: See I told you. What the hell is Lou thinking? You had to get him out of there.

Me: Come on, don't blame Lou. He is the reaosn why we're here.

Me: Yeah, and Dusty Baylor (that's what I call him) got the Giants to the World Series. I want results, dammit!

Me: It's only Game 1, jackass. Calm the F down. We've got Big Z going tomorrow, and when we even it up, we just need to win one in L.A.

You get the picture. I think you can understand why it really is so important for the Cubs to get this schneid over with and just win a title.

Win it for The Goat. Win it for The Bartman. Win it for The Curse.

Just win it, for God's sake, so normal people will stop walking down the street saying, "Look honey, there goes another poor Cubs fan. He's talking to himself."