I think my dog is gay

OK, so the first blog I write in two years is that I think my dog is a homosexual. (I looked it up, a homosexual does not have to be a person. Yes, I was truly bored.) You gotta get started with something, right? What better than a short story about the love two dogs share. Maybe I should just go back and watch Milo & Otis (were they dogs or cats, I can't remember) or something and spare the three or four people who might read this. Nahh, this might get entertaining.

Seriously, though, has a study ever been done on the homosexuality of pets? (I'm not that bored.) If not, and our wise federal government was thinking of doing such a thing, I am here to say it's completely unnecessary. I have the definitive answer.

It is absolutely possible, because my dog is gay. At least I am pretty sure he's gay. And if he's not, I know my sister's dog is way off the deep end.

Now just like there's nothing wrong with people being gay, I have to say although I never thought about it until now, I suppose it's OK between animals, as well. I mean even a dog or a cat needs someone to love in their own species. Think about it, if you were an Australian Shepherd, you'd get tired of licking your owner every day. You'd want someone (something) else to lick every now and then.

I think that must be the case for Reggie Bush. He has taken a fondness to my sister's dog Zeke -- and I mean from the first moment they met a few months ago when Zeke came over on a cool, brisk Sunday afternoon and immediately began the loving process on Reggie Bush.

Too many gory details may be a bit much for the lot of you, but I have to share the events of today.

So it's an uneventful Sunday afternoon, and I am sitting on the couch with my wife watching (what else?) baseball.

She looks up and says, "Do you see this?"

I say, "See what?"

She almost can't get it out because she's laughing hysterically. "Look outside!"

Reggie Bush and Zeke are licking each other in the face, and suddenly, Zeke opens his mouth and takes a little canine tongue from his new half Australian Shepherd, half Chow little friend. After a chuckle (while my wife thinks it's one of the funniest thing she's ever seen), I wasn't sure to be happy for them or a little disturbed.

Then I thought, what's the big deal? Everyone needs somebody to love. Even if he's a dog named Zeke or a mutt named Reggie.

I just hope they don't get too attached and we have to move to California or something.