It's da most wonderful time ...

So this is Christmas. Yes, Christmas my dear.

The holiday season is different for everyone. Some are excited and hate when Christmas Day is over. Some get a little blue and can't wait for it to be over to start feeling like themselves again. Then there are Scrooges and your everyday haters, who just hate it because other people love it.

All kinds of Christmas peeps, I tell ya. For me, Christmas is a time of reflection and a time to make others happy.

I used to love getting gifts. I always bought great presents and expected great ones in return. Didn't need to be expensive, but rather I expected people who knew me well to get me things they knew I would like. I used to use Christmas as a gauge to see how well my friends and family knew me -- or cared, even.

I don't care all that much anymore, and I know that's one thing about getting older. I don't buy for nearly as many people as I used to. I'd rather spend the bulk of my Christmas cash on Metry Mama, The Boy and my nieces and nephews. Much more fun.

But what I love to do even more is to think back to Christmases past. In fact, if I ever became a real-life part of A Christmas Carol, I know I'd be cast as Ghost of Christmas Past.

Just this morning while watching the weather, the guy told me that we had a good chance to break the record high temperature of 81 at Audubon Park set in 1984. Immediately, I thought back 24 years ago, and remembered swimming in the Coglaiti pool on Christmas Eve. Of course, it didn't last long because the water was like 68 degrees or something (which might as well be 32 degrees). But that day sticks out in my mind.

Since my Mom passed away in 2006, I always think about her a lot around the holidays. Just before she left us three years ago, she got real sick just before Christmas. In fact, it was very odd. We got the call that she had a short time (days) to live while I was in Massachusetts spending the holidays with my two sisters at the same time for the first time in 10 years. It was also just days after the Mama and I had started dating and just a few months after K came.

It was a strange and active, almost tumultuous time.

I remember often how my Mom loved Christmas. Absolutely loved it. One year in particular, I wanna say 1986, her and my Dad had been split for good for a couple of years, and she was probably the best mentally I had ever known her. It was that year and the next couple that we got along best. This particular Christmas had her feeling great because, for a change, she had money to buy presents for everyone. And when she was feeling her best, that's what she loved to do -- give to others.

I remember that she bought me tons of clothes. And my Mom had good taste, even as I was 18 or 19, she knew what sort of stuff I'd like. As most of you know, it's not easy buying clothes for a teenager. It didn't matter, though, as the family was happy and together.

I think back to, I believe, 1991. It was my Nanny's last Christmas. It was also one of the last Christmases I remember with most of my family on my Mom's side intact and together and, well, all there. My grandparents, both of whom either had dementia or Alzheimer's, were still feeling well enough to have company. My sisters and I were at my Mom's, who lived directly across the street from 126 North Alexander, the house in which I spent so much of my first 18 years.

I don't think I laughed as hard -- EVER -- as when PaPa received his gift from Nanny. It was a cement birdbath. My PaPa loved birds. He knew every bird there was that flew around southern Louisiana. It was a logical gift. For some reason, though, he didn't appreciate it. He wanted us to "get that damned thing out of here." Oh, it was one of those had-to-be-there moments, but for the eight or so people who were there, it was absolutely hysterical. It was PaPa in one of his last PaPa moments. Of course, my Nanny didn't appreciate that he didn't appreciate his gift. That wasn't so funny. But it did help to make the moment even more memorable.

There was the Christmas about five years ago I spent with my Dad and stepmom and her family. It's the last time I was with my Dad on Christmas Day. I miss those times greatly. I miss my family. I love my new family greatly, but I wish more than anything we could all be together.

Who knows? Maybe one of us will hit the lottery and be able to fly everyone here one Christmas. Maybe not.

This brings me to the present. The Mama told me last night that she was feeling blue this year. I know it has a lot to do with her job, and I totally understand. But I refuse to be down. I think back to the good times and realize that there are plenty of good times ahead. Twenty years from now, I might be blogging about that great Christmas of 2008 or 2014 or 2020.

I am so thankful for what I have. Which is why I don't worry about presents anymore. I have all that I need. Maybe not all that I want, but all that I need is much more important.

I hope you all feel the same way. But whatever the circumstances, I wish you all the happiest of holiday seasons. And if you have your Mamma, give her a hug and tell her hello for me.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!